Mother's Day

You were there for me when I could be there for myself.
You understood every angle, every cry, every laugh.
You knew my smile and every feature of my face.
You knew me before I knew me.
You loved me more than I could ever give you credit for,
And even in your death I understand that no one can ever replace your love.
You taught me about life and you taught me about laughter.
You brushed my hair ever so gently.
I smile and laugh just the same as you.
When I look at your pictures frozen in time, I can almost hear your voice.
I know I can hear your laugh. I can see your beautiful face.
Thank you for giving me a life I never knew I could have.
You're never gone forever. You allowed me to move on and be happy despite your absence.
You were and forever will by my mother.
You're never forgotten, never forsaken and never taken for granted.
Happy Mother's Day.
I'll see you someday.


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Thirteen years have gone by and even though I still cry at least once every Mother's Day, but they have become softer tears and sometimes even joyful tears. God has a plan and I trust in it. I could ask why for the rest of my life, but sometimes we cannot become who we want to be without a push or something to challenge us to our very core. I have fought and battled and I am happy to say that I am each day becoming a better, stronger, happier woman. I am, no doubt, someone that my mother (and my father) can be proud of. Together they have taught me many things. My mother instilled in me the ability to show unconditional love and my father the inept ability to get up every day and do my best. I'd say I'm very fortunate. Despite her death, I have been able to feel my mother's love carry on. Soon she will finally have a marker on her grave; this, the one thing I have wanted to do for her for thirteen years. No longer will her final resting place be a lonely plot without a name. Anyone who walks by her will know that she is there, and that she was a loving mother. Her posterity can find her and through my life and stories, be able to know the ancestor they might have never known otherwise.

I look forward to being a mother someday. I look forward to teaching and watching my own creation grow and learn and hopefully make this world a more peaceful and beautiful place. (Now, the husband finding part.....that's another journal entry!)

To all the mothers out there, don't forget how important you are. Your children might not even know where to begin in understanding your importance, but I assure you, someday they will and that is all that really matters.

I love you, Mom.