I have friends that are always on the go, constantly trying to find plans and never seem to be alone. I, however, am very different. I require time to myself. I require reflection, meditation, and space. Sometimes I wonder if I'm a walking contradiction because I seem to have qualities of both an introvert and an extrovert.
The older I get, the more I have become a bit of a naturalist. I enjoy real, whole foods. I enjoy the beauty of the Earth and I don't really enjoy TV as much as I used to. I love real conversations. Stars in the sky. Crisp, cool air. I love non-fiction stories about someone who made a difference in this world. I am starting to love learning. I love creating something -- whether it be a loaf of freshly baked banana bread or refinishing an old wooden sign. I guess you could say sometimes I think a little too deep or feel a little stronger than others may. I'm not sure -- as I do not sit in another's shoes; however, I do think a lot about, well, a lot. I think about the past, the present and the future. I think about how God created the Earth and how intricate and detailed everything about it is. I think about how miraculous the plan of salvation is and how doing good really can make us happy. I think about relationships and how our spirit, mind, and body form. I think about how our brains work and how our individual experiences shape our opinions and way of thinking. I find it interesting that most of us want to marry someone who possess similar qualities to that of our parent of the opposite sex (i.e. girls want to find someone who is like their dads). Do you all think about these things too? Am I alone in my wondering thoughts?
I saw a man today. He was old, wearing a torn set of coveralls, old dirty jeans, and his head was covered with an old green knitted beanie cap. As I was getting gas, he was pulled up on his bicycle and little wagon that was attached to the back. His wagon and front basket were overflowing with garbage bags full of aluminum cans. He went through each trash can, one by one, looking for more cans to add to his collection. He wore no gloves, he had no shame. He looked at me for a brief moment and as I looked back and gave a small half smile, I thought about who he is and even moreso, who he was. Did he choose the lifestyle he currently possesses? Where did he grow up? Where is his family? I wondered if he was hungry. I thought to offer him some food or drink, but I couldn't bring myself to talk to him. I should have though....Christ would have done that, and I am a disciple of Christ. Maybe this man once had a wife and children and a warm home to go to. Where does he sleep? Does he collect cans because he exchanges them for money? If that's the case, I feel that says something of his character. He did not once ask a single person at that gas station for money. Instead, he "worked" for what little he might receive in return. I've seen him riding his bike before...down the street, with his little wagon behind him. He has a strong limp and walks with one crutch. Could he perhaps be a disabled veteran? This man made me think. I promise you though, next time I see him, I am going to offer him food or drink...or something. I can honestly say that I did not pass judgement on him; however, I did wonder where his life lost it's course in order for him to end up digging cans out of the local fuel stop's waste bins.
Life is interesting. We never know what the future holds for us. This aspect of life is probably what I ponder the most. Where will I be in 10 years? 20? Will I be married? Will I have children? Will I live up to my own expectations? Will I be happy?
Well I know that's a lot for you to chew on. Two posts in one day -- consider yourself lucky! I love days where I have time to myself to write.
Oh, and I hope you don't think I'm a total nut job now.
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